Just a ramble…

Having depression sucks! If you don’t have it or don’t know someone who does your probably like yeah okay, a lot of things suck. There is just something about depression that you can’t understand if you are not in the situation. You wake up and feel great, only to later hate yourself and feel like you have nothing to offer the world. The pain you feel isn’t anything that can be fixed and even knowing what you feel is a struggle. A lot of the time you are  tired, exhausted even when you sleep the day away. That is if you can sleep if not you just sit there and watch Netflix or wonder why you can’t feel anything about anything. Then you wake up the next day and do it over again. Maybe you go to the doctors and get a medication to help. That is a great start they say but they don’t tell you the side effects of the drugs are being even more depressed and suicidal then you already are. It can’t get worse right? No, it certainly can. You go from feeling nothing to feeling like you are worthless every second of everyday. You have to explain to people why you are acting different or lie about how you are doing. I absolutely hate when people ask how I am; half the time I can’t actually tell you. I am alive so I got that going for me, but most days I don’t feel like it. 
End ramble 🍹

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